Delhi SHG Meeting - Naya Savera.......

I have attended the SHG meeting on Sunday the 20th Oct 2013 at Central Park, Connaught Place.   This was my first ever meeting ever since I first came to know about it in National Conference at Indian Social Institute in Delhi.
Today a total of nine PWS attended the meeting.  The meeting started with a silence for two minutes.  Then a formal introduction was given about every PWS stating his name,occupation and address.

इंसान के लिए कोई सीमा नहीं होती

 एक साधारण प्रयोग करे| कुछ मक्खियाँ को ले और उन्हें जार में बंद कर दे| कुछ समय बाद जार से ढक्कन हटाये| आप पाएंगे की एक दो को छोडकर बाकि सब मक्खियाँ जार की दीवार से चिपकी बैठी है| उनका शरीर और दिमाग मान चूका है की वे कैद में है और वह से नहीं निकल सकती है|

Great urge to speak fluent

These days something uneasy I am feeling, seems I relapsing to stammering again. As relapsing is very common in stammering. When I came back from SHG meeting or workshop, I feel very confident and get used to the basic techniques which make our stammering easy. I do bouncing, I stutter without struggle and seems like stammering has stopped to bother me. But in this comport zone, I committed mistake, I find excuse to follow the speaking ease techniques as it seems ridiculous to me. I want to follow others, I want to speak fast and fluent like others and then suddenly I loosed my track. Two days ago, I had to go somewhere and destination name seems difficult to pronounce for me. I have to stop an auto rickshaw and ask him to destination. I wanted to face this challenge by speaking the destination name exactly without any helping word. I did so but when I open my mouth I stucked in such a big block that I can’t even get out by using any technique, I tried bouncing but failed. It was really an embarrassing moment as I tried hard. I loosed the challenge as stammering won. At last I took help of some other word and relieved.  I really feel awkward that still stammering bother me, still I don’t know how to come out from a block. It was really a painful experience. After this couple of more times, I felt myself in same situation. I found that when I tried hard to win the battle, I always failed. I want to win from my stammering but I can’t. But why it is happen to me?? After deep thinking, I got conclusion that I left the precautions, I avoid bouncing (or wanna to use at time of block). I put myself in some situation where I don’t want to show my stammer. I put myself in comport zone, sharing stammering only with friends or close ones doesn’t matter a lot.  So my advice to all other TISA members that if you think that you have done enough work and now it is time to leave all those things then you will soon find yourself in great trouble. I understand this thing, If you have great urge to speak fluent or want to follow others way of speaking then it is bad for you. You have loved to speak in bouncing manner; you have to make yourself get used of easy stuttering. Avoid stammering doesn’t help in long run. So here I am going to start again. B B B bouncing..:-)

Come to SHIMLA

From my own personal experience, meeting other people who stammer, travelling with them, hanging out with them on a very frequent basis is what has healed me and helped me to become a better person. It was these times which slowly brought a sense of peace and which gave me enough belief in my own self to explore and find my own solutions to the challenges that I was facing. No direct benefit, No instant benefit but a lot of REAL and long lasting indirect benefits. After all whats there to lose? If nothing else, you will have a good time in Shimla.

Take one day off and put in more hours at work during next week to meet your deadlines! Life is all about going with your gut feeling. What does it, say ? If you feel like coming, catch a bus and reach by early Saturday morning! We will help you get accomodation.

For any query Contact Anupinder 9779977441

Transformation

A little story of transformation of a young man...(read the comments below this public youtube video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btHyuUbGzW4

Black and White

23rd Oct. Comm WS, Delhi.
Theory at ISI. Practicals at Palika Bazar. Eve of Deepawali. Heaven of Bargainers and quick deals. Abhishek and myself were also their for a quick bounce. Yes, we were checking out if we could practice acceptance in real life, say that we stammer and introduce ourselves with bouncing technique. All that we had to do was just say one line: I am s-s-s-sachin. All that the listener had to do was to listen and carry on. That's all. The whole interaction could take just about two minutes. The exercise went very well and in the bargain we discovered many shades of life. Of course we had our fair share of difficulties in the beginning.

Is Hope a good thing?

A few days back I was trying to think what could be a good parallel or simile for the hope which average stammerer (I included) carries in his heart, that one day he will be okay, he will speak like a “normal” person, he will be fully cured..

I suddenly came up with an idea: the only other example of such a phenomena is our faith in afterlife, in our indestructibility. The creation may end, but we are very much there, watching it as it ends.. We can not imagine a time when we will NOT BE. This faith in persistence of life after DEATH, is pernicious and found in almost every culture and faith. This hope in eternal life is at the core of all major religions. But it is problematic too, when not guided by “knowledge”, as Vivekanand discovered, when he went to America.

He met a lady who was a medium (medium between our world and spirit world). He was invited to a seance and there he saw how this eternal hope and faith in afterlife is used by charlatans to fool simple people in America. A young man was shown his dead mother (now, ofcourse much changed) and very gullibly he reacts- Mother! how beautiful you have grown in the spirit land! Vivekanand was amused and felt that people needed to be more objective even in religious matters.

Here is the incidence:

“There was one of those ladies who bring the departed spirits down to us — a medium. She was very large, yet she was called medium. Very good! This lady liked me very much and invited me to come. The spirits were all very polite to me. I had a very peculiar experience. You understand, it was a [seance], midnight. The medium said, ". . . I see a ghost standing here. The ghost tells me that there is a Hindu gentleman on that bench." I stood up and said, "It required no ghost to tell you that."

There was a young man present who was married, intelligent, and well educated. He was there to see his mother. The medium said, "So-and-so's mother is here." This young man had been telling me about his mother. She was very thin when she died, but the mother that came out of the screen! You ought to have seen her! I wanted to see what this young man would do. To my surprise he jumped up and embraced this spirit and said. "Oh mother, how beautiful you have grown in the spirit land!" I said, "I am blessed that I am here. It gives me an insight into human nature!" (from Complete works of Sw Vivekanand)

Now, going back to where I started from: Could it be that similar “mediums” are taking us for a ride, just because we have this irresistible faith in CURE? An IPWS has spent over Rs 20,000 and still does not know whether stammering can be cured or not (link 1, link 2) . The people who assured him of this cure, refuse to respond to his questions. Others say- such 'therapists' may not know technical stuff but their therapy has done 'some' good to 'some' people. Do people who charge fee for their services, should not be updating their knowledge and sharing it with their clients? At least on the important issue of CURE? Should they not discuss at the very outset with the client, what is possible and what is not? Can we use questionable means to honourable ends?

It is time that we realize that our faith in cure is hurting us. It has given rise to an industry selling us "Cure" through crash courses, pdf files (for 39 dollars), DAF machines (Rs 5 lacs in India), computer based programs etc etc. Yes, amid all this hectic "business", there is hope: self help and self help groups are available, Vipassana, Brahma Vidya, Yoga etc are there. Communication workshops run by others and TISA too are there. Hope is there but not a dreamy one- a hope based on facts and realities.

FEELING THE CHANGE

hi guys.
since i came back after attending chandigarh's communication workshop,i feel a deep change in my attitude towards this speech impediment..u know now its gud to stutter voluntarily..i observed when we stutter in this way in fact we r getting more relaxed while enunciating words...earlier it was tough to bounce on words but once u begin,it becomes easy to take it in every situation...
I know the habit we grown up since childhood,it wont vanish overnight but we have to put the effort...
I remember a adage "perseverance is the key to success."