May 24, 2012

Great urge to speak fluent

These days something uneasy I am feeling, seems I relapsing to stammering again. As relapsing is very common in stammering. When I came back from SHG meeting or workshop, I feel very confident and get used to the basic techniques which make our stammering easy. I do bouncing, I stutter without struggle and seems like stammering has stopped to bother me. But in this comport zone, I committed mistake, I find excuse to follow the speaking ease techniques as it seems ridiculous to me. I want to follow others, I want to speak fast and fluent like others and then suddenly I loosed my track. Two days ago, I had to go somewhere and destination name seems difficult to pronounce for me. I have to stop an auto rickshaw and ask him to destination. I wanted to face this challenge by speaking the destination name exactly without any helping word. I did so but when I open my mouth I stucked in such a big block that I can’t even get out by using any technique, I tried bouncing but failed. It was really an embarrassing moment as I tried hard. I loosed the challenge as stammering won. At last I took help of some other word and relieved.  I really feel awkward that still stammering bother me, still I don’t know how to come out from a block. It was really a painful experience. After this couple of more times, I felt myself in same situation. I found that when I tried hard to win the battle, I always failed. I want to win from my stammering but I can’t. But why it is happen to me?? After deep thinking, I got conclusion that I left the precautions, I avoid bouncing (or wanna to use at time of block). I put myself in some situation where I don’t want to show my stammer. I put myself in comport zone, sharing stammering only with friends or close ones doesn’t matter a lot.  So my advice to all other TISA members that if you think that you have done enough work and now it is time to leave all those things then you will soon find yourself in great trouble. I understand this thing, If you have great urge to speak fluent or want to follow others way of speaking then it is bad for you. You have loved to speak in bouncing manner; you have to make yourself get used of easy stuttering. Avoid stammering doesn’t help in long run. So here I am going to start again. B B B bouncing..:-)

8 comments:

subodh singh said...

Any technique of speaking for stammerer works only when your speaking speed is slow. If your speaking speed is fast then no technique works for you.....

sachin said...

दुख मे प्रैक्टिस सब करें- सुख मे करे न कोय ।
जो सुख मे प्रैक्टिस करे - दुख काहे को होय ॥

J P Sunda said...

Yes, Umesh, stammering and the old patters do come back. But you have a very good support network in Delhi to face this ;-)

@Subodh : slow is relative thing. Compared to speed of light, everything is slow, and actually some scientists are saying that even speed of light is slow :-)

lalit said...

nice Umesh ,u can watch ur feeling and things going on ur mind ... and ultimately u got answers from yourself .

good bro now ur becoming doctor of ur own :-) keep sharing

Harshvir said...

waise TISA ne stammering ko jaise higlight kia hai. kisi na kisi ke man mein kabhi tees zaroor uthegi aur stammering ka sloution niklega..

amit dixit said...

its true Umesh..regular practice is required...thanks for ur honest sharing..@sachin sir aapne Dohe ko bahut sahi modify kiya hai:))

Jitender Gupta प्रथम said...

Ishwar bhi usi ki help karta hai jo khud ki help karate hai.
So do self help with SHG.

Amitsingh Kushwah said...

Good article Umesh.