शीर्षक आप खुद चुनें

 

 Inspired by Abhinav and Amit, I am learning Tableau. Here is my first Viz:

Stammering self, non stammering self and the Self

 Upanishads say that he who says he knows, knows not and he who says he doesn't know knows something. The meaning is that the reality cannot be grasped by the senses and if somebody says that he doesn't know it, he at least has come to a state in which he has understood the limitations of the senses. This takes him on a journey of self discovery in which he goes to his core. 

He negates all the manifested things through the process of 'neti neti' ( not this, not this) and ultimately reaches the pure consciousness which is the ever existing reality. Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi said that we should abide in that Self and that was jnana. In that state only the Self exists.

Isavasyopanishad says he who sees himself in others and others in him has no sorrow, worry or trouble. He sees only the Self. There is nothing other than the self.

I had a discussion with Dr. Sachin recently. I knew that he also read Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi a lot and slowly the discussion went into the Bhagavan and Indian philosophy. When it came to the point of abiding in the Self, he told initially he was not sure whether to abide in the stammering self or his non stammering self. Later on he realised that the Self was beyond all these.  

When we came to the point of discussing the concept of 'he who says he knows, knows not', he told if a person says he is a stammerer he is wrong; if he says he is a non stammerer, again he is wrong. He is beyond all these.

Yes we are beyond all these concepts. The real recovery from stammering happens when we understand this reality. It doesn't happen through any technique. All the techniques like bouncing, prolongation etc should be discarded at one point; to borrow the words of the Maharshi once again, like the stick used for stirring the fire getting burnt in the end.

As Sri M, the great yogi of our time, says in his talks and in his writings, one of the sparks for anybody to go along the path of Self discovery is depression or sorrow. This is corroborated by the fact that the first chapter of Bhagavat Gita is known as Arjuna Vishada Yoga. 

So let's consider the stammering as the necessary spark for us to go on the path of Self discovery and achieve the real recovery. In that state where only the Self exists, is there anything called stammering self or non stammering self?

Appreciation letter

 Every year a few staff members of  BSNL Shimla get appreciated for their work..I had not achieved this distinction in the first 14 years of my job.. Finally got it this year.. Happy to share :)

Blah Blah

 I overheard this interesting conversation between a Communication expert and a young B.Tech student, who I think, stammered but communicated quite well:

Student: What is it that happens to me sometime? and why?

Expert: You mean "stammering"? You see some genes cause speech center in our brain to develop in such a peculiar way that...

Student: You mean my father, who also talks like me- gave me his genes to me and not to my brother?

Expert: Well, your father did not do it on purpose but the way genes get distributed, sometime ..

Student: So, you mean to say that it is a genetic disease?

Expert: No, no, no- you see, genes are not important- but when you speak in a particular way over the years, you develop a manner..

Student: You mean it is a habit?

Expert: No, no- try and understand: when people react when you stumble, it makes you develop a mindset..

Student: You mean it is a mental health issue?

Expert: Of course not. And remember : it is only the "crazy" people who change the world (-the expert made an air quote gesture stylishly -).. But that is not the point. It is the society which cheers when Marlon Brando speaks with a horrible accent but ridicules Porky the pig, when he stutters! Why does society reacts differently?

Student: So, you mean society is at fault for my stammering. The society has stigmatised a normal variation in speech behaviour. It is a social evil, can we say then?

Expert: No, no- dont go that far. Society can say anything. They can say that our politicians are corrupt but who cares? But when they say- go get your stammering fixed then we will give you a job.. Now, that is a different matter. Isn't it?

Student: You mean to say, there is politics involved here? People ganging up on one poor stammerer in the play ground? and in the interview? Should we make a political party, burn some tyres and block some highways?

Expert: Please dont talk of burning things here. I am an asthmatic. I get my wheezing attacks when they burn the rubble on the other side of the moon. In the first place, why are you so interested in stammering? You are talking fine.. Are you concerned about your father? Is that the reason? In that case you better send him.

The student looked confused and finally went away. I kept wondering: do I also talk like that expert sometimes? doing exactly opposite of communication? 

Anyway, I had a good laugh afterwards about the whole conversation and understood why communication is more important than just talking in English!

Let's Talk About Stammering

Hello friends

For a long time I have been thinking of doing this, but as it is said that you need some brute force to cross your limits. So, this time when I met Sachin Sir in Dehradun, I expressed my desire on doing this because it gives me limitless opportunities to speak to strangers.

Today I went to Cubbon Park, Bangalore to try this activity. I reached at 10:00 am but today it being a raining Sunday and also a long weekend, so not many Bangalorian were there in the park. So I sat on a bench with perplexed thoughts. I was thinking that if I go and stand on the walk-way then no one would turn-up. But then, I changed my thought and I reconciled myself that - to do this activity today I woke up early than on other Sundays. I traveled 12 Km and walked 3 km and if I don't do this then what is the point in coming here and waking up early. So with a scared heart I stood up with the thought - LET'S GIVE IT A TRY. 

I hold the poster in hand and stood at one tri-junction. Many people passed reading just the Poster. But this gave me confidence that at least people are noticing me. 

Soon after, a group of 4 boys come towards me and I wished them Hiiii...They asked me "What is Stammering" and I being a stalwart TISA member explained them everything I knew about Stammering. 

Then came a group of 5 students. They were all doing PG in Christ university. They told me that they have some classmates who stammer. Actually, with them I wanted to talk on stammering but the conversation took a turn and we talked on everything other than Stammering...😄😄. They were very friendly and with them I spoke for more than 30 minutes. 

Then, a old friend of mine who met me in Cubbon Park only through stranger talk activity long back saw me and approached me. He is having Salon Business and he and I are so comfortable talking with each other that we had a conversation which lasted for more than 30 minutes. 

It was just an awesome experience because through it I realized that I can do those thing that had scared me for a long time.

Same activity I did around 2 months back and I'm attaching some pics of that activity too.

 

Ravi Kant Sharma

PWS

9461257111

Also I request that if someone is having access please post it on TISA Website

हाँ ,मैं हकलाता हूँ

नमस्कार दोस्तों ,

मेरी Stammering Interview  देखने के लिए नीचे दिए 3 लिंक्स पर क्लिक करें।  धन्यवाद 

1     https://youtu.be/4cROjSPpzYE

2    https://youtu.be/OTCZTgIsVnU

3   https://youtu.be/QGeRaZwmJxw

---संदीप राजा 

Bundle of joy

It's been a month since my daughter was born. I have realised from day one of her birth that my affection for her is very strong, similar to my feelings for my mother and wife.. It seems God plants this affectionate feeling in every parent's heart, so that they take best possible care of the new-born..
         I have observed steady shift of personal goals and ambitions since her birth.  There is a feeling of belonging, a feeling of self-assurance.. It seems that I have reached my destination, my goal of life..  My stammering has taken back-seat, her care and well-being are of utmost priority as of now. My focus has shifted from I, me and myself to her. It seems God teaches us love, care and selflessness by letting us take care of our child. She is indeed a bundle of joy.
        

राष्ट्रीय सम्मेलन 2019 l भोपाल l 27, 28, 29 सितम्बर l पंजीयन प्रारंभ l

द इण्डियन स्टैमरिंग एसोसिएशन तीसा वार्षिक सम्मेलन के लिए भोपाल में आपको सादर आमंत्रित करता है। 

प्राकृतिक सौंदर्य से भरपूर एवं झीलों के शहर से नाम से मशहूर भोपाल में हकलाने वाले व्यक्तियों का राष्टीय सम्मेलन 27,28,29 सितम्बर, 2019 को आयोजित हो रहा है। इस सम्मेलन में देशभर के हकलाने वाले साथी सम्मिलित होंगे। 

सम्मेलन में शामिल होने के लिए एवं जानकारी के लिए इस लिंक पर विजिट करें:- पंजीयन करें

अमित 9300939758

मेरी पहली ध्यान केन्द्रित कार्यशाला

मैं राकेश जायसवाल। हाल ही में तीसा की विकासनगर देहरादून में आयोजित संचार कार्यशाला वर्जन-2 का हिस्सा बना। वैसे तो मैं कई कार्यशालाओं में भागीदारी कर चुका हूं, लेकिन यह कार्यशाला थोड़ी अलग रही। अलग इन अर्थों में की तीसा ने पहली बार अपनी कार्यशाला में ध्यान को प्रमुखता से शामिल किया। हम सभी साथी प्रतिदिन सुबह 7 बजे से शाम  7.30 तक सत्र के हिसाब से कुल 6 घंटे ध्यान करते थे और बाकी समय में हम हकलाहट और संचार से जुड़ी तमाम बारीकियों पर बातचीत करते थे। मुझे इस कार्यशाला में आने से बहुत लाभ हुआ और हकलाहट के साथ ही ध्यान की गहनतम गहराईयों में जाने और उसे समझने का अवसर मिला।वैसे देखा जाए तो हमारी हकलाहट में भी ध्यान की बहुत अहम भूमिका है, क्योंकि भले ही हकलाहट जुबान पर होती है, पर उसकी जड़ें कहीं ना कहीं हमारे अंतर्मन  से ही जुड़ी हुई होती हैं। ध्यान के जरिए हम उस तक पहुंच सकते हैं और अपनी हकलाहट को काफी हद तक नियंत्रित भी कर सकते हैं। प्राकृतिक सौंदर्य के बीच हम सभी साथियों ने इस कार्यशाला में ध्यान और संचार के नए पहलुओं को बारीकी से महसूस किया। 

- राकेश जायसवाल, उत्तरप्रदेश।
मो. 7275939750

Report on Chandigarh Communication Workshop held on 2-3 March 2019

A communication workshop was organized by Chandigarh SHG of TISA (The Indian Stammering Association) for Two Days i.e 2^nd 3^rd March 2019 including boarding and lodging.

The workshop saw the participation of approx.33 people from different walks of life varying from doctors, engineers, Ph.D. scholars, Garments shop owner, Retired veterans & students age from 19 to 65 years and yet they all were very similar to each other when it came to stammering. Organizers and guest were people of repute from their respective fields who shared their experience with stammering and also explained that stammering is a very minuscule part of life and one can achieve anything if he accepts stammering. The duration of the workshop was of 2 days. These two days were packed with activities and games to make you understand the importance of acceptance, ways to manage stammering and acquire good communication skills.

AGENDA...

A Day Before...

13 PWS reached one day before on 1^st march itself and welcomed by Host and Doast Jasmeet Singh who take care of their belongings and booked their rooms at Bhawan.

DAY 1...

The day started with some instruction and ground rules for the upcoming two days. The first message of the workshop was HAKLAO MAGAR PYAR SE (stutter freely as much as you can in these two days).

 In the Beginning, we were shown a video on acceptance by TISA founder Dr. Sachin Shrivastav and National Coordinator Mr. Harish overviewing its importance in dealing with stammering and congratulating all participants and organizers.







Icebreaking session...

 The icebreaking session was organized just after breakfast and we all knew each other by name within an hour while performing different interesting activities. Importance of listening in good communication was also explained to participants via icebreaking activity.

Practicing Pausing Technique after eating Chocolate

Techniques such as Bouncing, Prolongation, voluntary stuttering, and pausing were explained to participants.

In addition, JUSTDIAL activity was done. We were told to call them and talk with voluntary stuttering. The purpose was to explain that the person in front of us is more interested in the content of speech rather than the manner of speaking.

After lunch, there was a Presentation Delivered by Dr. Renu Goel briefing What is Stammering? Why do we Stammer? How Stammering develops in a child? Helpful tips for parents of PWS, Stammering in Adults and at last what can be done to improving our Stammering.

 After that, we all gathered in front of the building and told shopkeepers and bystanders that we are stammerers and there is nothing to be ashamed of in it. With this activity, individual have overcome the fear of public speaking. It was the first time for some people who have spoken boldly in open and do some practice of acceptance.

Now after that, we were divided into teams and given instruction to go to different places such as Punjab University (PU), Sukhna Lake etc for stranger talk and know their perspective about stammering.

 This activity was done to better accept ourselves as stammerers and get rid of the psychological burden which we stammerers have accumulated after years of stammering and feeling of guilt.

Day finished with debriefing in their individual teams. People shared their experience of the stranger talk and the activities of the day.

Stranger Talk

DAY 2....

At the start of day 2, we all had to speak for 10 minutes in front of friends and share whatever we want. For many of us, it was the first time on the speaker. Everyone was listened patiently and encouraged to stammer freely.

The aim was to get the people out of their comfort zone and start speaking with stammering from today.

The second activity was more of training on Vipassana and the importance of deep breathing and pausing in our speech. We had the Vipassana meditation for around 1 hour. Participants had very enthusiastic Q/A session with Vipassana teacher.

 After lunch, everybody had to come on stage and practice techniques in front of everyone.

   

Participants helped each other with techniques and pledged to use these techniques in real life situations.

In the afternoon with some more discussions done and after that everybody enjoys dance on Punjabi beats. For the next activity participants were called to showcase their special talents. We were amazed to see so many talents such as mimicry artist, folk dancers, theater artist & singers among us, additionally an individual group skit is performed.

Sheet 1 Goal Setting

Sheet 2 Goal Setting

     

 After completion of activities, we all set the goal to be accomplished in next 1 month to get better on acceptance and to overcome our fear of stammering.

 In the end, everybody was given memento and certificate to appreciate the fact that we have shown the courage to confront our stammering.

All in all, these communication workshops are tailor-made for you if you are a stammerer. You get to meet so many stammerers for the first time that you stop feeling different from others. You make some excellent friends for life in these two days. Everybody is so supportive of each other. The tagline Haklao Magar Pyar Se will sound ridiculous at first but as you proceed through the workshop you will understand its true meaning. This workshop can really get your inner potential out if you are willing to take all its learning with yourself, at least for me it was the case.

Priyanshu Mishra

Tata Motors Ltd.

Rudrapur Uttarakhand

So, let me conclude by thanking all of you for your time and valuable insights.

Thank you so much for joining us and participating in this workshop and for bringing your expertise and experience around the table and engaging in such fruitful, constructive and open exchanges throughout the two days.

We look forward to welcoming you again in Chandigarh

We have a Regular Self Help Group Meetings Organised on every Sunday for 1:30 hours at Punjab University Student center Chandigarh. For  more Info Contact me on Mobile No. #9988990330 Jasmeet Singh

                                                              Financial Statement

Registration Fee for 2 days :

1.       Locals ( No accommodations Required ) - ₹1000

2.       Dormitory (1-night stay on 2/3 march ) –₹1200

3.       Double bed Room (1-night stay 2/3 march Without attached toilet ) - ₹1575 cost for 1bed only

4.       Deluxe Double bed Room (1-night stay 2/3 march attached toilet ) - ₹1875 cost for 1bed only

 NOTE:- Registration fee including 2 days breakfast/ lunch/first-night dinner and evening Tea/lassi

EXTRA:- Dormitory 1bed - ₹80

                Without an attached toilet 1 room includes 2 bed -₹750

                 Attached toilet 1 room includes 2 bed - ₹1350

Note. Check-In check out at 12 Noon

 

Invent Role: Create Opportunities

 Many of us, after desensitization and having learned a few techniques, often wonder: What next? Where do I go and practice my new communication skills? Many pws keep waiting for the “right opportunity”. Some, smart ones, create these opportunities by inventing a social role for themselves.

Pankaj, a young man from Almora, has done Diploma in Mechanical Engineering and is now preparing for competitions. I met him a year ago- then again, he visited me at SMTA sometime back. We discussed a few basic ideas about stepping out of comfort zone. He was also active in MOOC 3 then.

Then, as it happens frequently, we lost touch; we were busy in our own mad worlds. Yesterday, I received a phone call from him, followed up by some pictures on whatsapp. He had followed ONE idea to its fruition.

After Pulwama tragedy, he contacted local traders, shop keepers, cab drivers in his little sleepy (but picturesque!) town (Bagwali Pokhar) and organized an awareness rally about the need to support our defense forces and to be vigilant about terrorism in the country. To his surprise, he discovered that local schools supported his initiative whole-heartedly and the students were happy to take out a rally. Day after day, he noticed a change in his communication style. He was more confident, he was taking quick decisions and he was speaking in public at last! (He can be seen in a blue shirt, with a megaphone in his hands in the top picture!)

Above all, he felt that he was connected to an idea bigger than himself. He was feeling happy and fulfilled. No therapy, could have given him this feeling and this sense of achievement and Self-confidence- he was convinced.

How did he do this? He identified a social need, he created a role for himself and stepped into it, without worrying about - “Mujhe kya milega?” (What will I get out of this?).

If we look around ourselves, Life is offering us many such opportunities to help and serve others every day. Why wait? Look carefully at your neighborhood, your office, your city. Surely someone needs your skills, your help. Jump into it with joy. This is your McMera Program - 100 percent free and 100 percent effective.

Fear, Adventure, Performance, Prep, Joy...

Fear, Adventure, Performance, Prep, Joy.. all these have such a huge role in learning and growth. Recently, I had a chance to go to Delhi after a long long time. Transition from Herbertput to Delhi is like sudden beaming up from Jhumari Talayya to New York central square - for me at least. So I was a little nervous. That nice kind of feeling: You are frightened but you also are itching to go ahead! That kind of feeling.. many of you must have felt it when you raised your hand in the class for the first time. The trick is move into this feeling- instead of running away from it. You can even begin to savor (enjoy) this kind of inner tension.

OK, back to Delhi. Kundan who works in Delhi Metro had gifted me a smart card sometime back. Yes, the two things I was dreading that day, were- riding metro and calling an Ola cab! Yes, yes, I know these are the signs of old age when you set your ambitions that low..

Any way, I phoned Kundan. He assured me that that smart card is still valid. He sent me a metro map. I walked from Ginger Hotel to nearby New Delhi station metro. There was a huge crowd. I took an auto to Rajiv Chowk and entered the quiet metro station there. My card worked like a charm. I boarded a metro for Noida. Few minutes later I was calm and thoroughly enjoying my experience like Cindrella in the palace..

Then, I got off at the last Noida station, called an ola cab on my phone and began scanning the crowded traffic like Agent Bourne, expecting machine gun fire from any of the moving cars swishing around him.. After couple of phone calls, we connected and I boarded the cab. As I entered, my name was announced and I was welcomed.. !

In a nutshell, everything went well and my little sense of anxiety began to be replaced by a warm glow of "Oh, I have done it- and done it right!". I had done all this in the past too. But then, I forgot these skills due to non-use over years. Learning and relearning is dependent on couple of things: How do we interact with initial emotional discomfort and how we anchor the entire learning process into positive emotions- sense of joy, achievement etc. The last makes for deep memory.

Finally, if we have a little sense of adventure, it helps- like jumping in a pool or venturing out in the rain without umbrella. This sense of adventure can be cultivated.. This is what TISA NCs are all about: a big adventure! Those who land up there, even accidentally, discover that they always were very social deep inside. Communication is just one small part of being social. When you are social, you automatically become good communicator.

So, look at the big picture. Dont get lost in the details. And get ready for the next Kumbh (NC)...
May 2019 bring you lots of adventure and travel!

Acceptance - Five years review

         It has been a little more than five eventful , roller coaster years since I accepted the concept of acceptance. My acceptance journey started by attending the TISA communication workshop of June-2013.

         What triggered my desperate search for help were two events . The first one was that I had to attend a meeting with senior officers and I was not able to introduce myself-I got severe blocks. The second one was during an informal party in a restaurant , when I left  my seat for a few minutes for the introduction round to pass.

         The first event was public embarrassment  for me- stammering in front of senior officers. The second event, to avoid introducing myself fearing stammering ,was a personal embarrassment. 

          I attended a party yesterday. I had to introduce myself to my colleagues and seniors of company. During introduction  I got stuck in my name, I stopped , used prolongation and bouncing combination and finally succeeded. After some time our newly appointed company-chief of   state arrived and we had to introduce ourselves to him one by one. He was accompanied by our district head and they went to every individual's seat for introduction. 

        The state head shook my hand, I greeted him and then fumbled in my name. I stopped and again tried and said my name with prolongation. While introduction, my district head helped me out once when I had another block. The chief listened patiently to me , and then advised me something related to my work.

          So, what did I achieve with all these years of acceptance? I am now able to communicate along with my stammering. For me , this is a big achievement-for I try not to avoid speaking situations. I try to speak , accepting that I may stammer. 

           I have learnt from life that personal  embarrassments, which come from running away from challenging situations such as  speaking, are much more long-lasting and painful than any kind of public display of the fact that I stammer . 

            Thanks to TISA and concept of ACCEPTANCE- which is a lifetime work-in-progress.

"HAKLAO MAGAR PYAAR SE"

       
        

"डर से मत डर"

अभी थोड़ी देर पहले ही बहुत ही उम्दा घटना हुई।
हुआ कुछ ऐसे की मेरी भैया की 2 महीने बाद शादी है और आज उनके ससुर का जन्मदिन है। भैया ने फ़ोन पर उन्हें बधाई दी और जब वो फ़ोन पर बात कर रहे थे तभी मैं सोच रहा था कही उन्होंने मुझसे बात करने के लिए बोल दिया तो मैं क्या बात करूंगा। एक अजीब सा डर लगा। लेकिन फिर ख्याल आया - रवि तू क्यों डर रहा है? "डर से मत डर" और एक वीडियो जो थोड़े दिनों पहले मैंने देखा था उसके बोल याद आ गए। मैंने उनसे बात की और काफी देर तक बात की। सच बताऊ तो मज़ा आया😊😊

https://youtu.be/UImHL0NuVSo

"डर का खेल, निडर हो के खेल"

रवि
9461257111