June 5, 2015

Using filler words before the troubled word is dishonesty of me

Sometimes, when my heart would be full of fear....I would use filler words before speaking the troubled word to avoid the anticipated horrible moment of stammering. I think, this praactice is dishonesty. This practice means I am denying that I am a stammerer. Such a practice will simply delay my recovery process.

And, I am well aware that sooner or later, I would need to confront all those horrible moments of stammering because there is no way of skipping these things. Simply, I can't deny the reality that sometimes, stammering is the way to speak for me. Ideally, I should accept this dishonesty as well that I am dishonest sometimes and I shouldn't condemn myself. But, it is not happening. Such a moment of dishonesty makes me feel bad.

My motto- TO SPEAK EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO SPEAK TO ANYONE IN THIS WORLD.

I don't know, when I will achieve this stage.


2 comments:

Satyendra said...

In Toast Master, there is a person responsible for counting "Filler words" (Ah, eh, well, hum etc.) and since it is considered "poor oratory", this attracts minus marks. But this only shows, that normal people (not only pws) do use filler words, because they are not ready for the next word or thought. In other words, it is NORMAL behaviour.
No need to over-analyse yourself. End of the day- do you get the job done or not- THAT is the big question.
Keep sharing...

Satyendra said...

"TO SPEAK EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO SPEAK TO ANYONE IN THIS WORLD."
I was wondering about this.. And if you would permit me to share my thoughts: Dont you think this statement focuses too much on Speaking? Speaking is an "act" which should ideally be embedded in a social function of "Communication". What does it matter if I SPOKE very well but people failed to understand or totally misunderstood me?
I now, say to myself: To communicate exactly the meanings which I have in my brain and heart.. (In other words, I dont worry much about the language, its polish, the words etc. I use or the way words come out. I make sure (by asking) if the meaning conveyed was the same as I intended..
Just my thoughts- nothing Gospelish...