August 13, 2014

Acceptance made easy:3 powerful steps to make it happen

For most of us acceptance has become such a fearful and frustrating part that we feel stuck into. If you think so I am here to prove it wrong.
The ways which I am goanna share with you will do wonder by just doing it for some days consistently. These techniques I have personally used and is working day in and day out.

1.choose a field of interest apart from what you do-for me it was meeting new people, observing people behaviour, and most of us love these things in some manner. Decide to make a start with a target to talk some 10 strangers today(prepare a short introductory statement and go ahead,(hi mera nam kundan hai mai bandra me rehta hu,mujhe naye logo se milna bahut pasand hai,mai ye jan ne ki koshish kar rha hu ki bilkul naye logo se bat karte hue kaisa mehsus hota hai and  kya ham aisi society bana sakte hain jahan koi anjana na ho)Forget stammering until you achieve meeting 100 new guys. After that what happens is miracle, yes miracle.
2.choose to make phone calls-making phone calls is most daunting task for stammerers, don't worry. Those days would become your past as soon as you decide. Set target of 21 phone talks(see if you have to get what you never had,do what you never did,remember this line everytime you postpone to pick up phone or make a call).Go ahead. For some 3 days make calls alone in a room, or sitting at park, from market, the point is the place where either you are alone or there are enough voices around you thus nobody cares who is talking to whom. Ideal places could be market, a bit busy streets. Speak up, no matter how, see you have to reach targets(focusing on target keeps our mind away from hurdles littering our way)
3.pen what you feel everyday-this is indeed most ignored part of our daily lives. At the end of the day write some lines about pleasures, achievements of that days.
Believe me these 3 simple ways has almost change the way I look my life, and what is more satisfying is you don't think about stammering all the time now. There are lots of other things as well that need your attention.


sachin said...

Thanks Kundan for sharing your thoughts! I notice that you have used "Choose"- "choose to make 100 phone calls etc. etc.".
Yes, this is very important. We can "choose" to act, feel and think in NEW ways. When WE choose it, it becomes easy. But when it is thrust upon us (with all good intentions), it becomes troublesome and we give it up soon- at the first difficulty. This is the "cost" and the "benefit" of self help.
Also, what you say about writing down our experinces is very valid- a western philosopher said: Life unexamined is life unlived.
When we write, we analyse and examine. That is what makes the learning our own for the rest of the life..
This is what Harish meant by: Write to Health!
Bravo! Keep it up..

kanpur vikings said...

Forcing yourself to do a certain task which you feel is right and you actually want to do that task but that task or activity has been scary and unexplored till yet is also path towards acceptance....just a thought ???

kumar kundan said...

thank you sachin sir!today i even phoned MD of a delhi based company,although he didn't pick up phone,said he was busy.I feel my consciousness is shifting naturally.

chetan nath said...

These are the Root cause of Stammering and I hope this will help you recognize the root cause and simply have a strong Zeal and flush that reason out from you life, and Live a Confident life again.

The reasons for stammering as per my knowledge is :

1. Childish imitation of other stammerers either in the family or outside.

2. Feeling of insecurity
3. Strict, rude & rough guardianship.
4. Shy or introvert nature from childhood.
5. Very fast speaking habit.
6. Fast thought process.
7. Lack of co-ordination between thinking & speaking.
8. Stiff competition in all spheres of life.
9. If one is bilingual or multilingual, confusion may occur while speaking.
10. tremendous fear and tension from childhood.
11. Humiliation in front of friends and class mates.
12. If one is frightened of every little thing.

Whatever may be the reason, In nut shell, it occurs due to excitement tension fear nervousness hesitation anticipation of blocking and lack of confidence & courage to speak.

(I genuinely appreciate Kundan Suggestion and It would certainly work, Simply Stand Out and Live like a lion)

Chetan Kumar Nath ( facebook )

sachin said...

Yes-courage is the final and royal 'techniqe'..

kumar kundan said...

Thanks chetan for your comments.As far as I see reasons no 1 & 7 have been the cause in some cases of stammering and ,but other things like feeling of insecurity,fast thought process,competition is quite common to people of every sphere let stammerer alone.
Humiliation in front of peoples happens to many people at some time of life so its ok,but yeah it aggravates our stammering if humiliation was due to breaking sound,isn't it?
Stammering is more than just a fractured speech.It is has neuro-psychological roots which needs a right attitude and consistent effort to deal with.

sachin said...

For modern understanding of causes, please check the page above.