November 5, 2012

May Equality remains everywhere

I have come across so many stammerers in my life , mostly after joinning Tisa . I found that stammering is a more major issue or problem for severe stutterers like me where we struggle at almost every word we speak unlike the mild or moderate stutterers .

Some ex or mild or moderate stammerer laughs at me or at other severe stammerer .They think we are the worst one and they are superior ...God bless them .

Also in many and almost every shg i had attended i saw the shg is always ruled or governed by the ex-stammerers or mild stammers ,no chance is ever given to severe stammers .No i am not talking about myself i was given a lot of chance but i am worried about other severe stutterer , they simply sit quiet and feel like unattended . Once i had attended shg in chandigarh and when it was my turn to speak nobody seems to be listening to my words they were simply ignoring me and my words may be they were unable to understand me i dont know the reason exactly.I felt very bad and never went to attend chandigarh meet again .

In some shg meet i found that the ex- stammeres were talking n talking without realising the fact the others severe stutter were also present and they were not at all given enough or equal time to say or share their views .

Severe stutters should be treated equally .

10 comments:

Jitender Gupta प्रथम said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Manimaran said...

yes Gorav, you raised a valid point. This happened largely due to lack of interest shown by the severe stammerer. In Chennai SHG meetings also some of the severe stammerer talks very less. I request all the SHG coordinator to give a fixed time of say 15 min to each PWS without any interfere. If any excess time is available, this can be used whoever is willing to talk more.
I suggest Gorav not to skip any meeting because of this reason, as you are the loser. Always march forward and best of luck.

GORAV DATTA - Be " EXACTLY " who you are said...

@ jitender
yeh baat to sahe h bahna to mene dhoond rakha aur mein esse svikarta hoon accept - jaise ke classes bunk karna , kese relative jo ghar pe ae unko na milna , job na karna , phone na karna na uthana apne haklane ke karan . lekin me shg meet jahan tak ho attend karta hoon .
Aur rahe baat kaale chashme ke wo bhe bhe doond raha hoon melega jo jarur karidonga aur tumhe bhe dikhanunga . yeh post mene apne leye nahe likha h balke mere jaiae kaye aur severe stammerer ke leye ...
May all be blessesd .

lalit said...

nice observation gorav.. i also got this type of felling ones in delhi 3 days workshop ..where some activity(open talk) dominated by pws who stammers less.. i realize they were new or not understands tisa philosophy.
but i haven't found is problem in delhi sgh and other workshop

any way u have raised a very good point ..keep pointing this unless it disappears

Harish Usgaonker said...

If PWS are feeling dominated or cornered during an SHG, then it is an issue of concern. We anyways face these issues in the "normal" world. SHG is a place where we the PWS feel at home, can share our thoughts with ease, without the worry of being judged.

Let's look at it at the other way- people with mild stammer face such issues in the "fluent" world. But in SHG, they are at a comfort zone and in much better position to be heard. Inadvertently, the joy of speaking may stretch a little more, ending up talking for a longer time.

So what's the way out..? The coordinator has to play a part here. See that everybody gets a chance to speak, and be heard. Dr. Sachin had recently shared a wonderful article from the recently published book (Stuttering: Inspiring Stories and Professional Wisdom). The article link is here: http://t-tisa.blogspot.in/2012/10/for-shg-coordinators.html

Coordinators should read this article. It talks about the significance of listening skills in a self help group, especially the coordinator.

It's not easy being a coordinator. But facing such challenges is something that works well and helps us in recovery.

Thanks Gorav for raising this question. It will help us all in making SHGs more conducive for the PWS to experiment with their speech. Let's keep learning from each other.

Pramendra Singh Bundela said...

That's very brave of you Gorav. I think this is a valid point to be raised.
I too have felt that sometimes some PWS including myself become the cause of such discriminancy in SHG meets.
As Harish Sir have explained very well, this is one of the most serious responsibilities of the co-ordinator that everyone should get equal opportunity to speak.

Thanks Gorav!
Pramendra

PP...Pramendra said...

That's very brave of you Gorav. I think this is a valid point to be raised.
I too have felt that sometimes some PWS including myself become the cause of such discriminancy in SHG meets.
As Harish Sir have explained very well, this is one of the most serious responsibilities of the co-ordinator that everyone should get equal opportunity to speak.

Thanks Gorav!
Pramendra

sachin said...

Gorav- you want to talk and others to listen? Perfect! Come and conduct my brand new Computer class!! and also talk to both of us here in H'pur. Phone me about your plans!

GORAV DATTA - Be " EXACTLY " who you are said...

@sachin sir
i could clearly imagine your smiling face and your laugh which is very loving to me & it makes me laugh at myself my stammering and the unfavourable situation . i will meet you this diwali and call when i reach home .

sachin said...

@ Gorav- Great! I will be waiting..