February 17, 2012

Acceptance


As we are seeing a lot of talk on acceptance on our blog, workshops and National Conference, I think its right time for me to give my two cents too!
So lets start from a very basic question : What is acceptance ?
Acceptance is DOING! Its NOT a thought or affirmation that you need to repeat to yourself 10 times a day - "I accept that I stammer". Actually saying it to your own self may not even help(but create more conflict due to you mental state and outer behaviour/life)! You may feel a sense of relief when you say it the FIRST time to your own self but after that move on to the DOING part because thats 99.99% of acceptance! DOING ?? What DOING ?
DOING involves going out and meeting other people who stammer, writing about your experiences on a blog and sharing it with the world, doing voluntary stuttering in your neighborhood, conducting an awareness session on stammering at your workplace and much more! I can hear - All this is NOT easy! Yes, it is not easy. So start small: Just go to a SHG and sit ( may be even quietly ) between other people who stammer. Tell your pet that you stammer. Talk to another person who stammer, on phone or in person and say that you stammer and slowly become comfortable with talking about your stammering. Then try stuttering on purpose. If you can just allow yourself to be with the feeling of unease, fear or may be pain, when you are doing the above, slowly you will start becoming comfortable with the NEW you : One who ACCEPTS his/her STAMMER.
Moral of the Story: Acceptance is a FEELING of being at ease with oneself and it comes from DOING not THINKING!
An assignment for people who may want to get into DOING mode right away: Make a call to any call center and say - "I Stammer " or "मैं हकलाता हूँ". (You brain will give you 99 reasons, NOT to do it. Mine also did, but I still went ahead and did it just now. Your thoughts are conditioned from past - Don't believe them :-) Search for Eckhart Tolle and see what I am talking about! It can help you on the journey of acceptance and your life!

5 comments:

Satyendra said...

Yess- we are changed by not what we know or think- but by what we DO..
Knowing and thinking is just a stage. We should not get trapped in that stage.. Many "Intelligent" people do that. Their intelligence sucks them up in an "intelligent" mind game and days pass by without any REAL change in their lives..

dabbang said...

yes sir i am trying acceptance

Er. Umesh said...

Perfect definition of Acceptance!! One of the best post I ever read from J.P side.

PP...Pramendra said...

Well said JP sir :)
I was recently talking about this with Sikander Sir in Delhi SHG meet and it came out in similar fashion, as...
Acceptance doesn't mean chanting day and night 'I Stammer' but the larger part of acceptance consists "Doing what you have avoided through out your life due to your stammer."

Kharvi Prakash said...

Very true J.P .. we can change our life by doing things practically. Almost taking the responsibility for the hardest thing that we never done before will take us to the level confidences..