October 11, 2013

X men: Born this way (Final NC questions)


I have heard that our problem is because we try to complete one whole sentence in one breath. I need some advise on how to break a sentence in smaller chunks.
This is true for many of us. A simple solution is: Instead of saying it, imagine, you are writing it; wherever you use a punctuation mark (comma, hiphen, colon, semi colon etcetera) – THAT is the place where you should stop and breathe and then carry one (while maintaining a normal eye contact). These are the points which often represent a natural break, a point where one thought is ending and a new one is beginning. Example:
I took a two year break not because I did not get an offer but because I thought doing MBA at this point in life will be easier than trying to do it later in life..
Imagine saying this with a break after every line – with smile and eye contact- like this:

I took a two year break.

This was not because I did not get offers.

In fact I wanted to do MBA. 

It was easy to do it now than later.

Smaller direct sentences not only help you- by giving you a chance to breathe- but they also help your listener my making processing of new information easier for them. Try this out in your next speech in your self help group!

Is stammering hereditary? Please explain in short.
Yes, in about 50% (or more) of cases- as per the current knowledge. But the transmission of this trait is not regular and predictable. Quite often, the eldest son and the youngest son may stammer. The middle ones and daughters may not stammer. But no hard and fast rules. Check these two links for more info: Ehud Yairy, Dennis Dryna
But this should not mean “the end of the road”. There are possibilities of genetic engineering in future. Also, as we discussed earlier, stammering among adults consists of 95% or more, of psychological issues, which can be successfully dealt with. This is as good a cure as any. Secondly, a fear often unstated: what about my children- will they inherit my stammering? Cant be predicted but IF they did, why fear? They too will learn to deal with it, as we have done, successfully. IF YOU and I work hard, we can definitely make the world a little bit more sensitive and accepting for the next generation of X men and X women!

What can be a good technique to slow down the speed of talking?
If we realize that tongue does not move on its own- but is moved by our mind, then we will understand that stammering, for many of us is a mind game. There are bound to be MORE than ONE, ways of winning this mind game. Find out, why are you speaking fast? Are you running away from something- some feared moment? Some chance event – like a block? Or the fear that I may be found out for who I really am, inside, a stammerer?
For dealing with such deep fears and phobias- a best technique is to join a SHG where members are regularly challenged by activities like “Metro challenge”, which many of you took up during this NC. Bouncing, prolongation, pausing, Voluntary stammering- all these techniques are helpful by slowing you down - and can be learned and practiced in SHG. Vipassana or any other form of regular meditation can also help, by slowing our thoughts and making us more aware of our inner motivations. Many people do not persist, because they do not find a supportive environment. So, start a SHG or a meditator's group or anything which helps you.

5 comments:

Anupinder Singh said...

these questions and there answers are great resource. thanks, Dr. Sachin for answering them. i also vary for gen-x but now i am relaxed and totally agree with Sachin's Answer.

Raja said...

Sachin - want to elaborate on 50% statement made by you. As per my understanding 50% pws have a genetic link in form of some sort of close relative. 50% is not the chance that ones offspring is cws if one is pws. The latter proposition/interpretation is quite scary for any pws.

Raja said...

Sachin - want to elaborate on 50% statement made by you. As per my understanding 50% pws have a genetic link in form of some sort of close relative. 50% is not the chance that ones offspring is cws if one is pws. The latter proposition/interpretation is quite scary for any pws.

sachin said...

Yes, Raja, you are right. It is very difficult to predict the transmission in next generation..

abhishek said...

Dear Sir, these answers are gems of wisdom for any PWS. After coming in contact with tisa, I have also felt that we are like x-men/women.I found my thought being expressed through your blog's image :)