October 11, 2013

The best Question yet..

I have been in touch with a SHG for some years. How do I measure my progress?
Are you more comfortable in company of other people- whether speaking or quiet? Are you able to listen calmly to others, without worrying about what you are going to say next? Do you recall better, what people told you, what happened in the office or college? Do you ask more questions in class now? Do you raise your hand more often now, whenever there is a volunteering opportunity? Do you initiate discussion more often with strangers at work or in park? Do you laugh and joke more with your friends?
If answer is yes, you are definitely making progress- even if you are still stammering. Measuring progress by number or severity of dis-fluencies is simplistic, erroneous. Comfort in social situations is a better indicator of your progress.
We have known people who have "stopped" stammering but feel threatened when some one else is stammering in their presence OR when discussion about stammering comes up. This is NOT cure. Becoming free of the FEAR of stammering, fear of being different, fear of being who you are- is the true and lasting cure. Once you are free of fear and are comfortable in different social interactions- then you should, like anyone else, practice and hone your communication skills- which includes listening, empathy, initiative, problem solving and other social and intellectual skills.
Let your focus be on "comfort", Communication and becoming a whole authentic human being. Only you can judge how far you have travelled along this path. Dont let others pass judgement on your speech and progress. You too dont judge others superficially.

1 comment:

lalit said...

very nice question , because one should about his progress , it give him motivation and right direction .