November 17, 2011

It needs CONFIDENCE not fluency!

Hi, I am Pramendra an engineering graduate, working as an entrepreneur in New Delhi (India) with some of my friends.

Yesterday, an amazing thing happened with me which I want to share with you here. We were seeking information for short code mobile phone messaging service (The 5 digit number service) for our business needs. We needed to go to various service providers’ offices and inquired them so I preferred to bring one of my co-worker with me, also an engineering graduate from a renowned college of the country. When we reached at one of the office, the friend with me was a bit reluctant to talk to the manager (provided he is a very talkative and not at all a shy person). It was shocking for me because I, like many of us, believed the reason for my not so good communication is my stammer or my avoidance to communicate because I have that constant fear of getting trapped in a block running in my mind. I always believed that great listening skills, good English, fluency and some elegant modulation in voice are the keys to be an effective speaker and....... “He has all of them then why he is being so much reluctant and excusing in spite of knowing the fact that I stammer and might not be able to communicate that well!!!”

Finally, I talked with them with my prolonged pronunciations, pauses and some blocks too and succeeded to inquire all the information we needed. Then at one of the offices a receptionist connected us to their chief at the head office on phone. “Telephonic conversation is the prominent part of my stammering fear and my friend knows this very well.” So, I handed over the phone and asked him to inquire. Again he was reluctant at first, then somehow took it and after some trembling conversation he returned me the phone saying... “Abe tumhi karo, pata nhi kya kah raha hai yaar!” (I don’t understand what he is saying, you better do it.) I took the phone instantly and after some initial troubles I somehow succeeded to inquire what we needed to know. While talking I observed the person on the other side has very commanding voice and even more effective English.

While returning to home I was thinking about what happened there. I am sure that English is not at all a problem for my friend, then what it was making him so uncomfortable! Then I realized it was ‘CONFIDENCE’.

While talking about communication we always talk about:

  • Great listening skills
  • Use of effective words
  • Slow rate
  • Impressive voice modulation
  • Genuine pitch etc.
and these all are very important.....

But we often forget to mention an important part of communication i.e.“CONFIDENCE TO COMMUNICATE WELL.” I realized it is a very important part and trust me if you have this many other needs mentioned above will follow automatically.

Thank you

Regards

Pramendra

8 comments:

sachin said...

Perfectly right. And "saying a,e,i,o,u in a prolonged way for exactly 40 days, mind you-" is not the only way of gaining this confidence.. Going ahead and doing what frightens you is the shortest route to such confidence, IMO...
Parmendra keeps sharing such heart warming experiences..They are of much enduring value than any technique or trick..

J P Sunda said...

Pramendra, as usual you are spot on!! If you don't believe in yourself even 1 crore gods and goddesses can't save you! Invite your friend to our National Conference :-)

Er. Umesh 9068322345 said...

Very nice inspiring thing. We all pws learn by this. Fluency is not everything, stutter can also do good communication better than fluents.

Pinakin said...

Very well said Pramendra. You have enough confidence, to surpass any obstacles and moreover, with the curiosity you work, will undeniably make you successful entrepreneur.
You generally speak very gently by perfect use of bouncing and I find your way to speak engrossing. Way to go..

PP...Pramendra said...

@Sachin Sir: Thanks a lot for every thing, you have always been my true inspiration. One of the million things I have learnt from you is to accept your self as you are and change the world. I am just on the very first step of following what I learnt from you.

@JP Sir: I always say this line in our SHG meetings that if Sachin Sir is Amitabh Bachchan of our 'Hakollywood' you are none other than Shahrukh Khan, such a dynamic but charming personality. I will ask him to join NC :)

@umesh: Thanks Umesh, we all are mutual inspiration to one another.

@TinTin: Thoda jyada tarif nhi hogayi! Thanks for all lies, tumhara cheque tumhare pas pahunch jaayega. :D
OK, jokes apart you are one of the best friends TISA gave me. Thanks for every thing.

TIJO said...

Pramendra i salu ur confidence,sometimes in situations like this we freak out at the last moment but you took the initiative and went ahead without any hesitation.
Self-Confidence is the key for success in every walk of life

lalit said...

nice Pramendra i always like ur approach(especially toward stammering )..ur r doing g8t..and inspiration for all of us

Sid said...

very well written ,very inspiring and I think most of the stammers have this confidence to speak though fluency may be missing.