Most of the pws are forever complaining !!!!! Life is very hard,people make fun of me,people think I am not confident,people do this people do that,and what not !!!!! Well I am not saying that there is no truth in this,it does hurt when people make fun of you and life does become pretty hard sometimes but you need to realize that u need to get out of the "I am the Victim mindset" and take control of your life.Lets take a few examples.
Life is hard when you stammer.-to be frank,no one has a perfect life,every one has his own baggage of problems ,if it wasnt stammering,it would have been something else,God gave you a problem in the form of your stutter but might have taken away several problems he gave to millions of people(take poverty for instance).
People make fun of me-To see this objectively,a very very few people are jerks who might have made fun of you,you should concentrate on the majority who understand your problem and dont bias (positively or negatively) because you stammer.And even when someone does make fun of you,my advice would be to give him a piece of mind then and there itself,this would show your self-assertiveness and take you out of the "victim mindset" by letting you take control of the situation rather than just be silent and let the person make fun of you.
People think I am not confident-Well people are not fault here,you wont agree with me on this but its your own behaviour which makes people think that you are not confident enough.The reason-You stay silent when you should have made a valid point,you let people take you for a ride,you think a hundred times before saying something radical about a guy even when you know he deserves it,you never raise your voice.All this because You might stammer.I want to tell you something buddy,you are stammering anyways,so why not still stammer but do it confidently,Just listen to your heart and say what you want to without having second thoughts and you will see a miracle change in how people perceive you.Take my word for that !!
I hope I have been a little bit helpful to you guys.See you later!!!!! :-):-):-)
This page was originally posted in my blog http://mystammer.blogspot.com/.If you like this post,do visit my blog !!
Life is hard when you stammer.-to be frank,no one has a perfect life,every one has his own baggage of problems ,if it wasnt stammering,it would have been something else,God gave you a problem in the form of your stutter but might have taken away several problems he gave to millions of people(take poverty for instance).
People make fun of me-To see this objectively,a very very few people are jerks who might have made fun of you,you should concentrate on the majority who understand your problem and dont bias (positively or negatively) because you stammer.And even when someone does make fun of you,my advice would be to give him a piece of mind then and there itself,this would show your self-assertiveness and take you out of the "victim mindset" by letting you take control of the situation rather than just be silent and let the person make fun of you.
People think I am not confident-Well people are not fault here,you wont agree with me on this but its your own behaviour which makes people think that you are not confident enough.The reason-You stay silent when you should have made a valid point,you let people take you for a ride,you think a hundred times before saying something radical about a guy even when you know he deserves it,you never raise your voice.All this because You might stammer.I want to tell you something buddy,you are stammering anyways,so why not still stammer but do it confidently,Just listen to your heart and say what you want to without having second thoughts and you will see a miracle change in how people perceive you.Take my word for that !!
I hope I have been a little bit helpful to you guys.See you later!!!!! :-):-):-)
This page was originally posted in my blog http://mystammer.blogspot.com/.If you like this post,do visit my blog !!
8 comments:
Well, it's true if one is covert stammerer or slight problem but for people who have severe problem, life is hard for them than even handicapped person, I believe. Particularly in India, where person born with squint is considered as a disabled and can get the benefits everywhere where reservation is available but no mercy for crippled speech.
i agree with anonymous to an extent..it is true that for people who have a slight stutter,it is no hassle to stumble 1 or 2 words....but for severe stutterers it can be a conversation killer,,,as people might get impatient with his speech blocks,,making him feel even worse than before...
One has got to practice the techniques and reduce his anxiety...
@Anonymous
Seriously do you think a crippled guy is luckier than you,I know you are high on emotions right now,but just take a moment and think what a disabled guy has to face in everyday life,and do you think reservation makes up for all his misery,if given a chance he would gladly be you and thank god for his kindness ,would you be able to do the same if God gives you a chance to be him,take a moment and think !!!
@Dhruva
Like us PWS, for handicaps also, again we have to see the severity of disability..
I know one of my friend who has slight abnormality in his one leg and even he can run at slow speed though he is considered disabled as per our rules, however, I agree with you that in some cases their life is really miserable to live.
As far as struggle for job is concerned, consider the case for some white collar job where stammerer and handicapped face interview and have similar qualifications but the nature of job might prompt interviewer to select handicapped and today these types of jobs are abundant. In other field, such as military, air-force and police services where handicapped strictly are not allowed but what do you think stammerer is selected if he takes one minute to say "Yes Sir". (I am talking about in above cases PWS with moderate to high level of problem).
People are lucky who is rich but having only stammering problem than the poor person born with stammering who has some additional burdens in his shoulders.
I am not much emotional but I am happy that now I have been transformed from severe stammerer to slight stammerer during course of life so I can live independently and also living with some hope that like Hritik and others who have almost overcome their problems, one day I too.
I do not mean that whole the life we have to cry and regret and hide our other shortcomings in the name of stammering. I appreciate you for your boldness to fight against the odds and even any person follows your approach, every hurdle can be surmounted. I have been reading your posts and it is motivating for me that people like me live life positively.
I feel all of us have suffered greatly at some point in time due to stammering. Just because a few of us have come out of this hole, we can't reject the natural and valid feelings and experiences of other pws. Remember we were there too! :)
But at the the same time we should write about the beautiful view from the top!
peace....
I am sorry if sometimes I speak radically ,my motive is not to prove someone wrong ,its just that I wish others changed their mindset and see whats out there,my aim is not to reject others feelings its just concern for all of you which sometimes comes out a bit radical (After all I am 20 years :-) )
Dhruv, you don't need to apologize. If you don't tell people about the beautiful view from top, what will motivate them to get out of this hole and truth is nothing but a collection of all these different and varied perspectives
@JP
Pa ji- twadi filosofy mannu Eckhart di yaad dilandi hai.. Changi gall hai vaise to.. Tussi lage raho bass..Chaddo na..
sachin
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