October 18, 2012

Stammering is contagious........really?

I am not sure if i have used the appropriate title to, what i really want to say here.

It was day before yesterday only when i talked to Mr.Hemant jangra over phone and he shared that it was a bad stammering day for him.

And, i just shared some of my words that how should he react to such situations and how we should accept those FOREVER BLOCKS too.

And, the next day itself, i too experienced few of those FOREVER blocks........although i reacted far easy than before,but, still, it pained.

So, sometimes, i have felt that if you are going quite well and some of your stuttering friend  shares his speaking problems with you, you may feel the problem in yourself too.

Basically, what i conclude, our mind is so afraid of STUTTERING that just a hint of it and it starts to tremble with fear.

That is why i used the word CONTAGIOUS here.

May be a reason behind the avoidance behavior of stammerers to other stammerers as they might thought that spending more time with another stammerer may increase their own stammering.

But such fearful avoidance is not going to let you live freely.In this way, you are just hiding the wound under some dressing, although you know that letting it heal in open is going to work in long run.

So, the bottom line is that we should accept all the aspects of stuttering.................that will be the real cure.



7 comments:

Satyendra said...

Right, Ashish. I too observed the same phenomena in myself- till a few years back. But as you rightly say- as you accept that you will stammer once in a while and that it is okay, and as the FEAR & SHAME goes down considerably- I am no more troubled by it. In fact, now I LOVE meeting other stammerers..

J P Sunda said...

Very good observation Ashish...It could also be that when you talk to someone who stammers and listen to them stuttering "openly" you stop using your "speech tools" for sometime because suddenly stuttering becomes acceptable. But when you go out with the same mindset, your old reactions of judging and criticizing come back and then you feel like you are stuttering more...Whatever way, always remember that stuttering is a VARIABLE condition, it will always keep changing from time to time.

Joy deep Majumder said...
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Joy deep Majumder said...

@ Ashish : Its amazing that the phenomenon you are facing has been happening to few of us too..
In my case i have noticed when i just listen to a PWS,and just focus on the content of his/her conversation instead of the actual delivery mode, i just take back the thought exchanged, and the actual conversation minus the stutter leaves an impression on me , rather than the stutter itself .
As a fellow PWS i think it becomes our duty to try to focus on the content of the talk of the PWS speaker ,and try to conciously stop our brain to anaylse the speech pattern ,levels of fluency of the PWS .
I guess thats what we also want from others Non-PWS segments - to focus and take back our content and other positive attributes rather than the disfluency.

प्रभु ! कृपा हि केवलम् said...
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प्रभु ! कृपा हि केवलम् said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
प्रभु ! कृपा हि केवलम् said...

if stammering is contagious , why our parents or siblings or spouses or children don't have stammering problem ? even they Are living with us since many years.

Ashish ji, you just shared some of your words with me that how should I react to such situations and how we should accept those FOREVER BLOCKS too. Same thing I did 3-4 days earlier, from next day I also experienced BLOCK, about which I shared with you.

In my view- when we starts to give tips to other pws, we starts to deny our own stammering. But our unconscious mind starts to react .

I want to share one experience of my hostel life-
generally hostelers go to bed late night, so wake up also late. and go to mess for break-fast directly without bath. I also used to do same. I got a friend in mess during break-fast , who used to come for break-fast after taking bath. I impressed by him and one day I caught him & asked - dear, how you wake up so early? He given me some TIPS.
That tips worked on me just for 2-3 days, later I again came on my old track. After one-two week, I got that friend in mess again. I told him- dear, you are really great who can wake up early.
He replied - what great Yaar?? I also could not able to wake up early from that day, since I given you TIPS.

So its general phenomena. But Generally PWS thinks- it happens only & only due to stammering.

It is like newton's energy conservation law - energy can not be created nor destroyed only can be transferred from one state to other. So if you are transferring some positive energy to other, where negative energy of other body will go?
so I think, it is more better to share our stammering experience with big reservoir i.e. Non-pws as they will be less affected and our so many negative emotions immediately transferred from our mind.